My Yoga Cup Spillith Over

Today is my 4th day of doing morning yoga.

I am used to doing a 60-90 min session where I feel connected, relaxed and grounded afterwards but my morning sessions are limited to about 20-30 mins. Not as long to get the full benefits but enough to get me going.

Days 1 to 3...I went through my practice like a good little yogini and while I enjoyed the poses I never really got that "feeling" that made me fall in love with yoga in the first place. I started to wonder if perhaps there is no benefit to such a short session??

Day 4...today...it happened...I felt my "connection" almost immediately upon starting this morning, my breathe was instantly connected, I was completely in the moment and I was able to flow through my poses. I kept getting images of gentle waves lapping at the shoreline and lazily retreating into themselves.

Today I feel calm, aware and fully balanced. I love my bendy mornings and I'm so glad that I continued on despite not feeling the results right away. Maybe each of my morning practice's have been filling up my yoga cup and today it finally hit the top and now that it has, is spilling out,flooding my every cell and swelling up around me. Whatever and however, my yoga cup has now spillith over.

 

 

Tomorrow is a day off from work for me. My sister and I are taking the day to celebrate my grandfather's life who will have been gone 1 year tomorrow. I plan to start my morning with a full session and I feel like a kid at Christmas in anticipation of it. The rest of my day will be spent reflecting, laughing and loving.

Listen to yourself

I had the most amazing dream last night.

To my delight it was one of the first nights I did NOT dream of my ex husband and our reconciliation (don't ask me???)  which I have been dreaming of alot lately and waking up in a cold sweat over. I have honestly evaluated if I truly want to get back together with my ex because of these dreams and the answer always comes up a resounding NO! (big shocker)

But last night...<sigh>...oh last night! I had the most wonderful dream of the most wonderful man that loved and cared for me as every girl dreams. I don't know who the man was and can only really describe him as a "Mr. Big" type (the later years when he finally gets his romantic shit together)

I can't remember the details of the dream, I usually lose them if I don't write them down right away (and I didn't). But, I remember a feeling of adoration and love, concern and compassion all coming from him and filling me up.

This man was strong and powerful but not overpowering or controlling. I felt like I was precious to him but not owned by him. I felt I could learn from him without feeling less than him.

It was like fate was trying to tell me that I deserve this man, maybe even trying to convince me that I deserve more than my ex. As I write this now it occurs to me that maybe I was dreaming about my ex because he is all I've ever really  known or had and somewhere inside I feel he is all that I ever deserved.

All I know is I woke up this morning, I did my yoga, for me, because I like the way it makes me feel.

I made a healthy breakfast and packed a healthy lunch, for me, because I like the way it makes me feel.

I have calmly navigated the stresses at work and released my self imposed responsibilities that were never really mine, for me, because I like the way it makes me feel.

It's like somehow, I have given myself permission to recognize what I deserve and to do what's needed to get it.

Let's hope this is the beginning of me getting my ass off the couch and actually living my life.